Feelings and emotions

Love and hate at the same time: can this be and what to do?

Love and hate at the same time: can this be and what to do?
Content
  1. Can you love and hate at the same time?
  2. Causes
  3. Psychologist's advice

Love and hate often go hand in hand. Why does this happen? Because a person is full of various emotions. A particularly temperamental person cannot control his thoughts and feelings. Therefore, a storm is raging in her soul, which mixes all experiences into one whole. It is difficult to understand such a cocktail of sensations.

Can you love and hate at the same time?

The famous psychologist Z. Freud believed that a person's feelings of hatred and love can coexist with each other, since they are innate. If these feelings begin to manifest themselves very strongly in an individual, then one can judge his neurotic state. Love and hate are complete antonyms, however, they can be near. Psychology says that one feeling can easily flow into another: love into hate, and vice versa.

Why it happens? Because these two feelings are very strong. For example, a man in love, being next to his object of adoration, is simply bursting with happiness. When the beloved person disappears, then jealousy begins to torment the ardent subject. Different pictures of betrayal appear in my head, and feelings are questioned. If this state is strengthened and even supported by evidence, then love is replaced by hatred. Moreover, if evidence is never found, love returns again, displacing dislike.

Moreover, every time everything is repeated over and over again, if a person loves very much and suffers from his feelings due to too hot temper. Thus, a tangle of feelings is formed in his soul. This plexus is called splitting.

Causes

The main reason for the split of feelings is a huge and all-consuming passion. Love and hate are the same in strength. This is why they cannot easily overpower each other. However, these two emotions win with varying degrees of success.

So why are these metamorphoses taking place? They happen for the following reasons.

  • When a woman or a man chooses a soul mate that does not suit her / him. For example, a man marries a girl whose behavior is not very stable. She can be very affectionate and obedient today, and tomorrow she will be rude and leave in an unknown direction, but after a while she will return again. Can you imagine what a loving husband experiences during her absence? He imagines scenes of betrayal and therefore terribly hates his chosen one. In addition, his male pride suffers. As a result, hatred only intensifies. And when the person returns, the spouses reconcile, and love flares up with renewed vigor.
  • Splitting of feelings happens due to the long stay of the spouses in marriage. Native people annoy each other all their lives. When conflicts occur between them, they feel genuine dislike. However, if misfortune happens to any of them, the marriage partner feels sincere love and regret that he once hurt the other half.
  • If one partner experiences neuroses and latent aggression, then he takes out all these feelings on his passion. However, when his condition stabilizes, love returns.
  • If the subject realizes that he has chosen the wrong person, which he needs, but still does not want to let her go. In this case, love is often replaced by hatred, and vice versa.

Psychologist's advice

If you feel love and hate for the same person at the same time, then an internal conflict smoulders in your soul. You may not immediately identify the cause of such conflicting feelings. So first try to figure out the relationships that often cause negative moods. It is possible that your loved one, for whom you have an ambivalent feeling, from time to time behaves quite incorrectly. It is this behavior that causes temporary dislike.

If you want to fix the situation, then explain to your partner that you are not satisfied with a relationship that is more like a swing. However, such actions may not bring the desired result. And that's why. Adults rarely change their habits. If you are counting on the fact that someday you can reeducate your chosen one, then get rid of this idea. Re-education of an adult, even a loved one, will be a difficult test for you.

If you are an optimist and want to equate love and hate, then understand the following.

  • If you have a healthy relationship, love will only grow stronger after a fight.
  • If after a quarrel with your partner you have reached an understanding, then you will feel like happy people. If everything happened exactly the opposite, then the enmity will increase. Therefore, try with all your might to reach a certain compromise.
  • Partners need to not only listen, but also hear each other. This is how you will reach an understanding. Always try to take into account not only your point of view, but also the opinion of your partner.
  • Do not criticize your chosen one or distance yourself from him.
  • Ditch any doubts you have about your partner.
  • Give up the goal of defeating or completely “subduing” a loved one. Remember that you must move in the same direction with him. Then mutual understanding will come to you.
  • If your loved one seeks reconciliation with you, then go to meet him.

Do not be angry with your partner for a long time.

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