Table etiquette: rules of conduct and serving

The image of a modern successful person includes many details. One of them is the ability to stay in society and follow the rules of behavior at the table. Thus, you will prove yourself as a well-mannered and intelligent person.

The history of the emergence of ethics is very old. Some other cavemen knew how to behave beautifully and tried to teach this to others. Etiquette norms have evolved over time and have been improved each time. Now this science teaches us the correct behavior at the table.

Small details immediately catch the eye and can ruin the first impression about a person, so it will be useful to refresh the already known rules of etiquette or learn new ones. Experts recommend teaching children how to handle cutlery and serving the table from an early age, especially since modern manufacturers offer a wide selection of safe, bright and beautiful forks and spoons. It is believed that this skill should be practiced not only at a party or in a restaurant, but also at home.

Let's take a look at the basic rules that relate to table setting and cultural table behavior.

Eating is one of those basic processes that inevitably accompany people throughout their lives. During business lunches, partners come to an agreement and sign important contracts. Not a single festive event is complete without a buffet table or a grand feast. At the table, the family feels the strongest cohesion, since over a plate of food you can discuss all the problems and rejoice in the success of the household. Having lunch or dinner together brings people closer together and improves the quality of communication.

It is much more pleasant to deal with a person who observes the rules of etiquette, does not cause inconvenience to others, and eats quietly and carefully. It's never too late to correct mistakes in your behavior and become a more cultured person.

Let us consider in more detail the features of cultural behavior during a meal.

First of all, you should pay attention to the manner of sitting on the chair. A person's posture speaks not only of the ability to keep oneself in society, but also of habits and character. A confident person always sits with a straight back and takes up most of the sitting area., his posture is at ease and relaxed. It is this body position that is most appropriate at the table.

When positioned at the table, the hands are placed on the edge of the table, and the elbows are slightly pressed against the body. A slight forward tilt is allowed for the convenience of eating.

When eating, you need to be quiet and careful. Cutlery should not be taken away from the face. A person should eat calmly and slowly, carefully chewing each piece of food with a closed mouth. Do not smack, sip, slurp or make other sounds. And you certainly shouldn't talk with your mouth full, as it looks extremely ugly.

There are a number of simple rules, following which you can learn the correct behavior during a meal:

• The distance from the body to the edge of the table should be such that the seated person does not feel uncomfortable.
• Elbows and personal items such as wallet, keys or cosmetic bag must not be placed on the table. This is considered bad form.
• Do not reach for food across the entire table. Just ask the person nearby to hand you the plate or salt shaker you want, and then thank you politely for their help.
• To keep clothes clean, you can use a special textile napkin, which is placed on your knees before starting a meal. Small children are allowed to tuck the napkin behind the collar.
• Products from common meals should be taken with devices designed for this. The only exceptions are sugar, cookies and fruits.

Lunch or dinner is often held in a restaurant. For such a case, there are special guidelines for etiquette:

• The man misses his companion first. He must open the door for her, take the outerwear, move the chair. If the company consists of both women and men, then the meeting becomes more informal.
• If several people gather, those who are late wait no more than 15 minutes. Further, the meal begins regardless of whether the late arrived or not. The detainee himself apologizes to all the participants in the dinner and joins the meal. At the same time, it is not necessary to attract the attention of everyone sitting at the table and try to explain the reason for being late.
• When men and women participate in a dinner, the choice of the menu and the order of dishes usually falls on the shoulders of the stronger sex. He can offer his companion certain dishes and order them if consent is obtained.
• It is considered good form to start eating only when the dishes have been brought to everyone at the table. At the same time, those who are waiting can invite others to start a meal even when their dishes are not yet ready.
• You should not defiantly look at and smell the dishes, carefully consider each ingredient and comment on the composition. It looks indecent.
• The bones should be gently spat out onto a fork or spoon and placed on the edge of a plate.

Etiquette prohibits doing the following things in a restaurant:

• Carry out hygiene procedures while sitting at the table. Combing your hair, correcting makeup, wiping your face or neck with napkins is recommended in the restroom. It is also not customary to leave traces of cosmetics on dishes. It is better to blot your lips with a napkin before starting a meal to avoid lipstick marks on the glass.
• Blow noisily on food or drink. It is recommended to wait until it cools down, and then start eating.
• Call out loudly for service personnel, knock on a glass, or snap your fingers. It looks extremely uncivilized.
• Take food from the common plate with personal cutlery. Common serving forks and spoons are used for this.

As noted earlier, children should be taught etiquette from an early age. Children quickly learn new information, and the learning process is easy to turn into a game. First of all, the child needs to be taught to wash his hands before each meal. First, the parents themselves set an example and help the baby, and then this action will be fixed already on the machine.

The child should be seated at a common table with all adults so that he gets used to the company. There are special high chairs that will allow your baby to sit on the same level with adults and feel like a full member of the family. During lunch, it is not recommended to turn on the TV, which will distract from the process of eating.

A textile napkin can be tucked behind the collar. It will prevent food and drink pieces from getting on your clothes. For small children, special plastic forks and knives have been invented. They do not have sharp blades and teeth, so the child will not injure himself, and the bright colors will attract interest.

You should sit straight at the table; you should not sway in a chair and disturb others sitting at the table. Shouts and loud conversations are unacceptable.

An important point in teaching your child good table manners is not to play with food. It is necessary to explain to the children that such behavior is unacceptable, and that food should not be smeared on the table.

After eating, you need to thank the hostess for a delicious lunch and ask permission to leave the table. One of the ways to teach your child how to set the table is to involve them in the table setting process. Have your toddler help arrange plates and cutlery.

The rules of conduct at the table in different countries of the world are somewhat different from those we are used to. Some moments can be quite unusual and exotic for Russia. Let's find out what tourists should pay attention to in order to avoid uncomfortable situations:

• In Japan and Korea, is known to be eaten with special chopsticks. During a meal, they are supposed to be laid parallel to the edge of the table or on special stands. But sticking sticks in rice is strongly discouraged, as it is a symbol of a funeral.
• On the table in brazilian establishments catering has a special token painted green and red on both sides. The green side indicates that the visitor wishes to receive more food. And it often happens that the waiter brings new dishes almost without interruption. To limit the hospitality of the service personnel, turn the token red.
• Georgia famous for its wine. Unsurprisingly, this drink goes with almost every meal. Tourists should remember that during a feast it is customary to drink wine completely after each speech.

• In India and England It is not recommended to eat with the left hand, as in traditional Indian religion this hand is considered unclean. This rule also applies to shaking hands and transferring documents.
• Coffee lovers should be careful in Italy, since in this country it is not customary to drink cappuccino in the afternoon. Locals believe that it can have a bad effect on digestion. Another interesting fact: in Italy, Parmesan is not added to pizza or pasta. French etiquette is somewhat similar to Italian.
• Tourists traveling in China, fish is often ordered in restaurants. With this choice of dish, remember that you must not turn the portion over. This is a bad omen, which means there is a high likelihood of a fisherman's boat wrecking. After eating the upper half of the portion, it will be better to first remove the ridge from the fish and only then continue the meal.

The table should always be properly served, regardless of whether it is a business lunch or a family dinner. It teaches culture and gives the meal a solemn mood. At the sight of neatly arranged plates and cutlery, it is much easier to adhere to the recommendations for table behavior.

There are a huge number of ways to set the table, which depend on the time of day, the nature of the event and many other factors.

For a classic table setting that suits any occasion, you can use the following rules:

• There must be a tablecloth on the table. This will give even the most ordinary meal a festive and solemn mood. It is better if the tablecloth is of a light shade. Dishes on such a canvas will look stylish. According to the rules, the tablecloth should hang from the edge of the table by no more than 30 cm.
• Chairs should be placed with some space between them, so that it is comfortable for the diner to sit and not bump the neighbors' elbows.
• A serving plate is placed at a distance of about 2-3 cm from the edge, which serves as a stand for everything else. Deeper dishes are placed on top. Plates for bread and pies are on the left. Soups and broths are served in a special soup plate or bowl.
• Cutlery is placed on napkins made of cellulose. They are selected to match the tablecloth. Cloth wipes are rolled up on a plate to protect clothing.

• To the right of the plate are those devices that are held, respectively, in the right hand. Place a tablespoon so that the convex side is on the bottom. The knife should be with the cutting side towards the plate. The tines of the fork should point up. A dessert spoon is placed on top of the plate.
• Some people prefer to drink water while eating, so it doesn't hurt to put a glass of clean drinking water in front of the knife. In addition to water, the glass can also contain juice, compote or other non-alcoholic drinks.
• Plates with common meals are placed in the center of the table. They are supposed to put cutlery for general use.
• Hot drinks are served in a special coffee pot, and cups are immediately placed on the table.A small saucer should be placed under the cup, and a teaspoon next to it.
• Sugar is poured into a sugar bowl. A serving spoon is served with it. Sugar bowls with a dispenser are often used nowadays.
• All dishes must be perfectly clean, free of chips and cracks.

A person who comes to a restaurant for the first time may get confused in a large number of different cutlery. The following rule will allow you to feel more confident: the devices lying on the left side of the plate are held only in the left hand. These are usually forks of different sizes. A similar rule applies to cutlery on the right - it can be spoons and table knives.

As an exception, you can take a fork in your right hand if there is a crumbly side dish on the plate: rice, buckwheat, mashed potatoes. In other cases, a table knife can help to collect food on a fork.

Sometimes serving includes the presence of several forks and knives at once. In order not to get confused, you can gradually replace the cutlery during the change of dishes, starting with the ones farthest from the plate and ending with the close ones.

You can memorize the following combinations of dishes and the cutlery intended for them:

• dessert is eaten with a teaspoon or a special dessert spoon;
• tablespoons are for soups and broths;
• a fork in combination with a table knife is used for hot meat dishes;
• there is a special fish knife for fish;
• cold snacks are usually eaten with a fork and a knife;
• fruits are allowed to be eaten with hands or with special cutlery.

The rules of etiquette also determine how to properly hold cutlery in your hand:

• Place the spoon in your hand with your thumb on the top of the handle. The broth should be scooped away from you to avoid dripping on your clothes. If there is soup with pieces of meat on the table, then you should first eat the liquid broth, and then cut the meat using cutlery.
• It is recommended to hold the plug so that your fingers are farther from the base. In this case, you can hold both teeth down and up. It depends on the type of food served.
• When using a table knife, the fork is held strictly in the left hand, and the knife in the right. In this case, you can help yourself with your index fingers, they will more accurately direct the pressure of the device.
• The knife can be used to spread butter or pâté on a slice of bread. Do not take pieces of food from the knife or lick the blade.
• When using a meat knife, remember not to cut the entire portion at once. You need to gradually cut off small pieces and eat them.

A spaghetti dish can be difficult to eat neatly. But it's actually pretty easy to do. You need to place a fork in the middle of the serving, separate a small amount of spaghetti, wrap it on the cutlery and immediately bring it to your mouth. This method looks neat and beautiful.

At the end of lunch or dinner, cutlery should be placed on the plate parallel to it, while the handles of the knife and forks should be directed in different directions. This is usually a signal that you are done with lunch or dinner and the waiter can take away the cutlery. You should not move the plate away from you, you need to leave everything in its place.

It should also be noted that the fork and knife should not be left on the table while eating. You need to put them strictly on a plate, even after eating.

The rules of etiquette apply not only to serving and the ability to eat food beautifully with the help of cutlery, but also to the behavior itself during a feast. Regardless of where the meal takes place, at a party or in an expensive restaurant, there are a number of unspoken rules:

• before starting a meal, the guest usually waits for food to be brought to everyone at the table;
• you do not need to open alcoholic drinks yourself - this should be done by the waiter or the owner of the house;
• you should not talk at the table in a loud voice, as this may interfere with other guests from enjoying their meals and relaxing;
• if lunch or dinner takes place in a restaurant, it is recommended to clink glasses as quietly as possible so as not to inconvenience other visitors.

The rules of table etiquette include the manner of conducting a conversation. Thus, experts do not recommend discussing issues related to diseases, finances, political events and religion. When talking with one of those sitting at the table, you need to meet his gaze, listen carefully and not interrupt.

If some topics turn out to be unpleasant, you can try to turn the conversation in another direction or politely refuse to discuss the issue. If a tense argument arises, it is best to defuse the situation with a funny anecdote or an appropriate joke.

A cultured person should also listen to a number of useful tips:

• When someone is making a toast, stop eating and listen carefully. Conversations or other actions that distract from speech are unacceptable.
• The chewing gum should be wrapped in a paper napkin and carefully placed near the plate.
• Cover your mouth when using a toothpick. Do not break the toothpick and scatter parts of it.
• You can take bread from a common plate with your hands. You should not bite off a large piece at once. It is recommended to break off a small slice and then put it in your mouth.
• You cannot eat poultry meat with your hands, and then gnaw the bones from it. Such actions look indecent.
• Cutlery is usually passed with the handle forward and taken by the middle.
• After dinner, place your knee napkin next to your plate.
• A glass of wine should be held by the stem so as not to stain the glass and to keep the drink chilled.

These simple rules will allow you to increase your general literacy and culture in a short period of time, as well as show your best side during a business or friendly lunch.

For the rules of etiquette at the table, see the following video.