Self-confidence: what is it and how to develop it?
Confidence in your strength Is a good quality that allows any of us to go through life easily and freely. Then any obstacles are on the shoulder. This behavior sets up other people to be positive and serves as a good example. However, how difficult it really is to be a strong and self-righteous person. This quality of character is not given to everyone. How to develop it? You need to act. It is possible that you have long wanted to become a strong person, but did not know where to start.
Definition of confidence
A person who has confidence in character is endowed with such a mind that does not allow any doubts about the actions performed by a person. In other words, an individual with confident behavior completely trusts his thinking activity and considers it to be error-free. Confidence is categorized into degrees. Let's list them:
- moral confidence is based on the behavioral law in society;
- physical confidence is based on physical foundations;
- metaphysical certainty gives strength in thought.
Psychologists distinguish two types of confidence: self-confidence and confidence in the correctness of judgments. By and large, confidence is the mental state of a person who considers all his knowledge to be true. This character trait is developed on the basis of a certain life experience.
Psychologists also distinguish external confidence, which is based on factors coming from the outside. Such a phenomenon occurs when a person is indoctrinated with a certain behavioral model and thereby imposed confidence in their strengths and capabilities.
Sometimes a person herself inspires herself that her worldview is true. This phenomenon occurs due to autogenous training, which are designed to raise self-esteem.
Self-esteem falls if a person is not confident in their abilities. This speaks of his inner psychological problems... In this case, you need to seek help from a specialist. However, the help of a specialist will also be needed when a person shows notes of too self-confident behavior. This speaks of his inadequate perception of the surrounding reality.
Conclusion: if we rely on social and humanitarian knowledge and philosophical conclusions, then we can say that confidence is a kind of indicator of any knowledge and skills.
What does it mean to be a confident person?
When your behavior suggests that you are confident, then in this way you influence other people, and they, in turn, influence you. You feel the basis of inner peace (this gives you the strength to stay afloat) and have the right to make volitional decisions. At the same time, you perfectly understand that other people influence you in one way or another. They also have the right to make certain choices in their actions.
A confident person does not hide his feelings and intentions.... His psychology is about allowing himself to go through life smoothly and confidently. Therefore, he lives for people, and people reciprocate him.
Remember that being confident does not mean being aggressive towards other people. On the contrary, human psychology is aimed at being kind and sympathetic. However, self-confidence does not in any way imply submissiveness... A confident person does not cause negativity and restrains emotions where a person with other character traits can attack and bring harm to others.
Aggression is a bad character trait. It does not mean self-confidence at all. Vice versa, an insecure person tries to hide such a flaw through anger. By doing so, he causes even more anger in other people. Ultimately, this person may feel even greater insecurity in her abilities if she receives a worthy rebuff to her aggressive actions. The conclusion here is this: you cannot behave defiantly, thinking that this way you will be able to "root" your position in society. This behavior can even backfire, and your expectations are more likely to fall short.
Remember: self-confidence means that you feel as good in company as other people and do not look away when talking to another person, keep your back straight and your head in a slightly raised position, and always speak confidently and clearly.
When a person is confident in his righteousness, he should not deviate from her and go forward. If you can't do this, then you are suffering from low self-esteem. To gain self-confidence, you must know your rights and responsibilities too. Know that any individual has the right to happiness, feelings, respect in society, and the right to vote.
It is very easy to test your confidence. It is enough to ask yourself the following questions: "Do you feel confident when you communicate with relatives?", "Do you feel confident when communicating with strangers?" "," Do you feel that it is much more comfortable and easier for you to communicate with loved ones than with the rest? "
By answering these questions, you will be able to determine the degree of self-confidence. If you are afraid of communicating with strangers and behave aggressively with loved ones, then your behavior cannot be called confident. A self-confident person should inspire respect from others, and close people should feel that they can rely on you at any difficult moment. Then you can safely say about yourself: "I am confident in my abilities, knowledge and experience."
Psychological significance
Psycho-stability, namely, self-confidence is needed in order to feel comfortable in expressing one's thoughts. This quality of character gives the ability to withstand any psychological stress and inspires the confidence of others. At the same time, any negative feelings that can badly affect the mood of the people around are swept aside.
Confidence in character is an expression familiar to many people on earth. It doesn't matter what languages they speak. It has been proven that insecure people suffer the most from neuroses... In their emotional sphere, there is fear, anxiety, etc.
That is why it is so important to "harden" the character and have the right orientation in all areas. Rita and Rüdiger Ulrich have come up with a definition of self-confidence. By this factor, they mean the presentation of certain requirements and the independent implementation of these requirements.
In this case, there must be social environment around the person who puts forward these requirements and implements. Moreover, a self-confident person can afford those requests that he wants. Also, the person must have special skills for the implementation of the requirements and tasks.
There are other opinions that suggest that psychological significance of self-confidence is an integral part of the behavior of a person who seeks to occupy the right position in society. Having confidence in character, any individual can make any claims and satisfy them himself.
The famous scientific researcher I.P. Pavlov even put forward a theory. It consists in the following: the predominance of inhibition processes in the psyche over his arousal processes can serve as the cause of a person's uncertainty. Therefore, such a person cannot express his feelings and thoughts.
Psychotherapist Salter based on this theory gave characteristic of a self-confident person.
So, it can be considered strong in certain cases.
- When a person speaks emotionally, they express their thoughts openly, authentically and spontaneously. He relies on his feelings and they are genuine. Therefore, in his speech there is no softening in the manifestation of both positive and negative impulses.
- When behavior and speech are expressive and congruent, this indicates that a person is understandable both in terms of feelings and behavior.
- When a person knows how to resist the enemy and even attack him, despite the opinion of others.
- When a person does not hide behind formulations in speech and often uses the pronoun "I".
- When a person is not ashamed of his merits and personal qualities and boldly accepts praise.
It is very important to develop self-confidence as early as adolescence. This will enable a person in the future to go through life easily and freely. Thanks to self-confidence the individual acquires such personal qualities as:
- self-awareness that allows you to make decisions;
- self-acceptance that allows you to be realistic;
- high self-esteem and high self-esteem, which allow you to achieve a sense of self-satisfaction;
- responsibility for their own and other people's lives, which allows you to cope with daily problems.
What happens?
Confidence allows you to give yourself a real assessment of your capabilities. This state of mind is often confused with arrogance. Nevertheless, this psychological state has some aspects. They may be negative and positive. Let's consider them.
- There is external and excessive self-confidence. For example, a person only looks confident in his abilities. It may be that an inexperienced employee claims to be able to cope with the task at a certain time.He does not understand that he greatly overestimated his personal and professional qualities. Therefore, by the due date, the task remains unfulfilled. As a result, an individual with overestimated personal qualities receives complete disappointment from his activities.
- Self-confidence, when it comes to the professional sphere, is expressed in the necessary knowledge and skills. For example, a person works in the advertising business. He is creative, smart and experienced. Such qualities give confidence in their abilities and make it possible to go in the right direction.
- Basic diagnostics can determine the level of self-confidence. It consists of a set of some observations and questions. Do you want to test yourself? Then answer some questions.
- For example, you are in a difficult situation. Your friend or loved one is to blame for this. Can you assess his actions? Or say how you really feel about him?
- Can you afford to express an opinion that you do not like something?
- Can you make it clear to your opponent that you need to get a definite answer from him?
- Are you able to plan your activities and act strictly according to the plan?
If you answered all the questions with the word "no", then you have something to work on in terms of changing your thinking... Complete self-confidence implies expanding the boundaries of your consciousness and constant work on yourself. You should be accompanied by absolute freedom in mental activity. Self-confident people do not block access to new ideas, do not analyze their actions and do not divide them into right and wrong. They do not overestimate certain concepts and values, and they also recognize and reorganize their true needs and motives.
People with the right thinking trust their intuition, love themselves and those around them, always admit their mistakes. They know how to listen and do not draw conclusions in advance. For example, in a dispute, one person wants to convey to another the truth, which is not as simple as it seems at first glance. And his opponent has already drawn conclusions and thereby blocked further conversation. Therefore, you need to be able to listen to others.
By following some simple rules, you will gradually learn to respect personal opinion.
What does it depend on?
Self-confidence does not come out of nowhere and is not given from birth. It is based on solid character and has some criteria.
Self-image
The first role is played by self-awareness, which appears at an early age and develops while a person lives. Self-awareness includes the following components:
- self-control;
- self-esteem;
- self-perception;
- self-respect.
The level of personality claims
This criterion is formed by success and failure. The desires of all people are different. Some want one thing, while others want another. If the level of aspirations is low (it also has its own individual framework for each individual person), then a person's desires may not come true.
To achieve high goals, a person needs to have a high level of ambition.... If an individual says that he “doesn’t succeed, therefore he doesn’t need to do anything else,” then such a statement testifies to his low level of aspirations.
If a person has found himself in a certain activity and he succeeds thanks to his efforts, it means that he has a high level of aspirations.
How to raise?
Self-confidence and self-confidence lies in inner peace. Experts have developed some recommendationsthat will allow you to always achieve what you want. Let's consider them.
- You need self-identify, namely understand yourself. To do this, select a specific time. Sit in a chair and think about how you behave when you interact with other people. Think about situations when you had to defend your opinion.How did you feel at the same time: a winner or a loser? What words did you say? Then stand in front of the mirror and try to repeat the words that you uttered when arguing about something. If you yourself realize that you always behave insecurely with other people, then begin to correct the situation. Understand that you yourself have come up with a stereotype of behavior. Do not be afraid to say: "I will no longer swallow words and pronounce phrases quietly, but I will speak loudly and confidently when I have to defend my point of view in life."
- Start developing positive thinking. Just look at yourself with different eyes and say: "It's time to change from within." Human consciousness is flexible enough, so you can direct it in the right direction. This is his strength.
- Take action. Always think only about good things and about success. In doing so, include logic and reason. The more you reason, the more your thinking activity will develop and become more intelligent. Remember that certain knowledge and a very developed speech give confidence in your actions.
- Realize that you are a person who has your own characteristic qualities and dignity. You must be able to set goals for yourself and go towards their implementation. Then you will have self-confidence.
- Take responsibility for a weak person or start helping animals. This will increase your self-esteem and will be able to feel much more confident in the world around you.
- If people around you do not listen well to your opinion, then do not be discouraged. Just try to defend your point of view by speaking slowly, clearly and clearly. This requires some training. Stand in front of a mirror and look yourself straight in the eyes. Then prepare your speech and deliver it. Let the phrases sound in the affirmative.
- Posture is of great importance. Therefore, always keep your head high and your back straight. This will help you breathe properly and your heart will work without interruption.
- Observe the daily routine and diet. Stop being late for work and get rid of bad habits. Doing this will boost your self-esteem and give you self-confidence.
- Thank the people who helped you with something.
- Be an active person. Participate in various activities. This will help you learn how to communicate with other people and stop feeling insecure.
- Try to find friends and like-minded people. This will make it easier for you to always find a common language with strangers.
- Watch your appearance. Hair and treatments that improve the condition of your hair and skin. Beautiful clothes and bright appearance will definitely give you confidence in your abilities.
Psychological advice
A person who is not confident in his abilities will not be able to achieve anything in life. That's why learn to leave your comfort zone and take action. Relying on the advice of psychologists, you can easily increase your self-esteem.
Pretty simple guidelines will help you find your way to yourself. This will give strength to further struggle with yourself. Experts say: "To overcome yourself is to do the most difficult thing."
And to make it argue, use the following tips in practice.
- Each person has strengths and weaknesses. So here Always highlight your strengths and fix your weaknesses. Don't be shy about your positive qualities. And remember that all people make mistakes. Therefore, do not dwell on them, but move on. In everyday life, there are much more achievements than defeats.
- Exercise... Movement is life.
- Be mentally mobile and don't get hung up on problems... No one has become stronger from experiences yet. If there is a nuisance, then it is better to think about how to get out of it, but just do not cry and do not be hysterical.
- Don't fuss or rush.
- Set aside a certain amount of time each day to recuperate. Relax more. Meditation helps very well in this.
- Know your rights and responsibilities. Then you don't have to make excuses to anyone. A literate person will always be able to stand up for himself, as he knows the laws and rules of behavior in society.
- Be an organized person... Always perform first and foremost those tasks that you consider the most important and responsible. Then you do not have to blush in front of your superiors and make excuses.
If you have made any mistake, do not play and do not twist, but simply ask for forgiveness. Then try to fix everything, preferably as soon as possible.