How to start a new relationship after breaking up?

After a divorce from your beloved man or woman, you still need to live on. You should not give up on yourself by being disappointed in one partner. After the emotions and resentment have subsided, tears no longer come to your eyes, you can think about how to arrange your personal life. Finding a new true love is quite possible. How to start a new relationship after breaking up, and will be discussed in this article.

Such a serious and sad event as divorce and separation does not pass without a trace for anyone. This is a time of disappointment, resentment, uncertainty, fear for the future. Divorced men and women do not always deal with it quickly.

Psychology identifies the main problems that people face after breaking up.

• For many, after parting with a partner, self-esteem is noticeably reduced. Often, similar consequences are observed in those who have been cheated on. Due to a decrease in self-confidence, incorrect models of self-perception begin to form in the head: for example, a person thinks that he is not worthy of being loved. Such attitudes firmly settle in the mind, not allowing to move on.
• If the previous relationship lasted a long time, the person simply forgets how to behave when meeting and building new contacts. In other words, a woman or a man completely forgets how to flirt, show attention and courting.

However, some women have flirting, as they say, in their blood. But shy young ladies, who even before their first marriage did not allow themselves much in this regard, after a failure with a man, can become even more closed and confused.

Many husbands stop showing signs of attention to their spouses.Shared life and well-established relationships do not seem to push for this - after all, it is no longer necessary to win anyone's heart. Having started courting a new passion, they are not attentive enough, which often repels girls and women.

• Some people, in spite of their previous partner, want to start dating someone as soon as possible. To do this, they actively get to know each other, send out questionnaires to sites, flirt online and with friends. Often, such an onslaught only scares away. What's more, a rushed relationship or marriage can lead to frustration and pain again.

• Sometimes those who have been married cannot get rid of the role of wife or husband. Having started dating, they immediately show possessive ambitions, overly patronize the new partner, try to control him. In this case, the romantic period of the couple is completely spoiled. A new sweetheart or sweetheart begins to feel as if you have been married for many years, although this is not so.
• Excessive idealization of a new partner is a serious psychological problem. Women who decide to remarry literally draw the image of a prince in their heads. They are so reluctant to make the wrong choice again that they repel potential candidates over and over again.

The same goes for men. Desiring an ideal relationship with a new wife, they begin to make sometimes difficult demands. Trying to find the girl of his dreams, such a man misses out on real opportunities. Naturally, a barely started relationship does not work out due to the unwillingness and inability to accept new love for what it is.

• It is sometimes difficult for a woman with a child to find a new husband. Often, mothers are gnawed at a feeling of guilt in front of their children. Many women are afraid to bring a new man into the house of their children because he may be worse than the father and cause them inconvenience.
• Those who have been abandoned by their other half often develop a “sufferer” complex. Such people practically deliberately force themselves to relive the gap over and over again, not letting the pain subside.

For men and women who have experienced divorce, experts provide some useful advice.

• Do not withdraw into yourself, do not stop communicating with friends and family. If you find it difficult, let them help you. The sooner you deal with negative emotions and depression, the sooner you can start taking the first steps towards your future. Express the feelings and concerns that are plaguing you to someone you trust. This will help ease the depression.
• Do not run yourself, watch your appearance. Don't judge yourself by thinking that you have no one else to look good for. This is not true! You still have your children, loved ones, friends and colleagues. And new love can come at any moment. And so that she finds you, help her, remaining a beautiful and decent-looking person.
• Lovers always have a romantic period. Therefore, women should remember about light flirting and coquetry. And for men to restore courtship skills.
• Don't pounce on new love. Attempts to "ring" as soon as possible can scare anyone away. In addition, it is simply unpleasant when a person in a relationship immediately shows a possessive attitude and an unhealthy obsession. Do not forget about respect, patience, do not rush things.
• Expand your circle of acquaintances. To do this, you can, for example, sign up for a gym or a creative studio.

• Work on your confidence.Low self-esteem betrays itself in any communication. Such a person often inspires pity and is perceived as helpless. A confident man will certainly attract a woman. And a girl who knows her worth will always be attractive to guys.
• Do not try to find or cultivate in a new partner the qualities of your ex-spouse. These are different people, and you will definitely never find an absolute similarity. Look at your new love with a realistic look, without exaggerated requirements. If you just can't accept the new partner as he is, you should think about whether you made the wrong choice.
• Try to objectively assess your behavior in your previous marriage. Find your mistakes, try to work them out. It is very foolish to repeat them again, jeopardizing your new relationship. If you are hot-tempered, try to soften your behavior, learn to work with emotions. Excessive jealousy can also stress relationships. Analyze your habits and adjust yourself so that your partner is comfortable and calm with you.
• Women with children should not give up on themselves and forever dwell only on the role of a mother. You also have the right to love and a fulfilling life. Talk to the children and explain the situation to them so that they understand it because of their age. The main thing is to pay attention to how your loved one treats the child, how they get along. Help them build communication. Tell your new man what your children love, what hobbies they have, and organize a joint vacation more often.
• When building new relationships, try not to distance yourself from your children. Feeling neglected, the child may become jealous and deliberately spoil the relationship with a potential stepfather or stepmother.