Jealous guy: causes and signs of jealousy, how to avoid it?

Moderate jealousy in a relationship is even flattering and is perceived as a demonstration of care and love on the part of a young man. Showing attention is always nice, but sometimes a girl realizes that she has gotten too jealous a guy. The reasons and signs of jealousy, how to avoid it, and what to look for - you can learn about this from the article.

Excessive jealousy is not good for the relationship. Suspiciousness can be based on various factors. Low self-esteem is the most common cause. Deep down, a jealous guy is not sure that he is worthy to be around such a good girl, his own complexes cause him a constant feeling of discomfort and insecurity.

Another common variant is owner syndrome. Such a guy begins to think that the girl belongs to him, and she is not entitled to any rights and freedoms. He may try to control personal correspondence, trips and meetings with friends, indicate how to dress, with whom to communicate. Such behavior suggests that he does not see a person in the girl and is not able to understand that each person should have the right to choose. It's better to stay away from such a guy, since people with such views are often prone to assault if something makes them mad.

If a guy is too jealous, in some cases it means that he is simply afraid of losing his chosen one. The greater the fear, the more suspicion appears, especially if not everything goes smoothly in the relationship over time. A young man may be afraid of a frank conversation about problems, being afraid to hear that the girl wants to part with him, so he does not make attempts to start a constructive dialogue, but only throws unfounded accusations, succumbing to outbursts of jealousy.

Perhaps the girl and the young man have different ideas about the acceptable limits of decency. This may be the result of a different upbringing, character, outlook on life. If a girl is used to spending a lot of time in a male company, then the guy may misunderstand this. In such a situation, jealousy may arise due to misunderstandings, so it will be necessary to discuss everything together and outline acceptable boundaries.

Some guys get jealous because they judge by themselves. This is their psychology, they do not hesitate to cheat on their chosen one, so they are sure that she does the same. These men think that fidelity does not exist, and they change everything, they just do not talk about it out loud. It is extremely difficult to convince such people. Jealousy can arise from negative experiences in a young person's life. If he has already had an unsuccessful relationship, in which there was treason on the part of the girl, he may be afraid of repeating this story.

Sometimes suspicion is a manifestation of an overly violent fantasy. Such a person has certain plots in his head that overshadow reality, as a result, he may begin to accuse the girl of romantic attachment to her best friend or to her past boyfriend, or even to actors that she likes. If such a guy is jealous, then it will not be easy to convince him. It is even worse when a man with a rich imagination is addicted to alcohol - under the influence of the drunk he will completely cease to objectively evaluate what is happening and may begin to commit unsightly acts.

It's not always immediately noticeable that a guy is jealous. Some males can make high-profile scandals by throwing accusations, but most are used to not showing their emotions. This can be the reason for upbringing, because boys are often disapproved of openly expressing feelings, therefore, growing up, men prefer to keep everything to themselves so as not to become objects of ridicule. However, emotions do not disappear anywhere, and latent jealousy torments the young man.

There are some signs by which you can understand that a man is jealous, even if he thinks that he is carefully hiding everything.

• Search for evidence. The guy begins to look through the lists of friends on social networks, to study who comments on the posts and likes, tries to read personal correspondence on the phone, constantly wonders who called it. He suspects something and is now trying to find evidence to verify this.
• Manipulation. A girl who is already going to go to a meeting with friends may hear: “I thought we would be together today,” after which she, of course, will stay at home. Only here the guy, as if nothing had happened, returned to his business, because this phrase was only an excuse not to let the chosen one go to a meeting.

• Whims and bad mood. He is constantly dissatisfied with something, although there were no open quarrels and conflicts in the couple. The man is offended, does not want to talk, or answers rather rudely, but does not admit what exactly bothers him.
• Constant questioning. The guy may, as it were, jokingly wonder if the girl has a lover, if someone harassed her at work, but repeating questions of this content make it clear that he is jealous.

Even if he denies everything, without showing his emotions, you can learn from these signs that jealousy does not give him rest. If you communicate a lot on the Internet, then by correspondence you can also notice that not everything is in order.

To avoid unnecessary accusations and quarrels, start with yourself first and analyze your behavior. Perhaps you love attention and are used to unknowingly flirting with others, which drives the guy out of himself. This does not mean that you urgently need to get ready for a monastery and stop all contact with other men, just try to behave more restrained for the sake of experiment. If you like revealing outfits, try to choose a less defiant wardrobe, and it is better to demonstrate sexuality at home, alone with your beloved.

If you do not see anything in your behavior that could cause jealousy, but he still throws accusations, you do not need to try to come up with excuses. For him, this can become a sign confirming all suspicions, because if it is justified, then there is something to hide. Better in such a situation to ignore meticulous inquiries and remain equanimous.

Do not forget to pay attention to him, say that you love him, give compliments. Not only women like this, men also want to hear nice words addressed to them. Praise his skills and abilities, make it clear that without him it would be very difficult for you to cope with something, so that he felt needed. Compliment his appearance, for example, mention being in good physical shape, if he goes to the gym, let him see that you appreciate his efforts. Convince the chosen one that for you he is the best and most unique, then he will have no reason to be jealous.

If you are late at work, tell him about it, because his anxiety can be caused not only by jealousy, but also by the fact that he worries and worries when you are not at home at a later time. Let him know about the meetings you plan to go to without him, and don't be offended if he decides to call you during this time. Pick up the phone and talk to him calmly to dispel suspicions, but a disconnected phone can become a reason for a quarrel.

Tell him that his jealousy and constant suspicion hurts you. Do not blame him or say that he is bad, focus on your feelings. Do not hesitate to speak up and admit that you are upset and upset, it hurts you to hear unreasonable accusations, you feel depressed because of such words from a loved one. Any adequate man will not want to make a girl suffer.

To deal with jealousy and the reasons, you need to understand the motives of this phenomenon, therefore psychologists advise trying to build a dialogue with a guy and discuss this issue. Many men are rather reluctant to talk about their feelings, so it is important for the girl to show delicacy and patience here. The guy may need help to cope with his fears or complexes, which lead to outbursts of jealousy. Try to convince him that together you can overcome everything, but for this you need to discuss the problems that have arisen, and not close in yourself.

Try to communicate more often, discuss various issues and life situations. This will benefit the relationship, teach how to build a dialogue and help develop trust, which plays a very important role in a couple. Share your thoughts with your boyfriend - your openness will help allay his suspicions.If a young man cannot deal with complexes on his own, invite him to seek help from a psychologist. The main thing is to do it tactfully so that he feels your support and care.

Unfortunately, in some cases, you won't be able to succeed. A jealous person simply does not want to change, listen to words and look for some kind of compromise. He is convinced that he is right and will continue to plague you with reproaches, no matter what you do. In such a situation, there is nothing left but to break off these relations. Any girl does not deserve to live with a pathological jealous person, because such a situation will turn into continuous torment.

If he not only does not want to change, but also makes scandals that reach the point of assault, this is a good reason to break off all relations with him right away. No man has the right to raise his hand to a woman, and if he was able to hit you once, then this will be repeated.

For the main reasons for jealousy and what to do about it, see the next video.