High self-esteem: signs and methods of correction

It is very important for any person to have adequate self-esteem, since deviation from the norm negatively affects health, self-realization and building relationships with other people. Can you help arrogant individuals who feel their own greatness and superiority over their environment?

In psychology, increased self-esteem is considered one of the components of self-awareness. It is correlated with the overestimation of real possibilities, the orientation of all events exclusively towards success. This means that a person with an overly high assessment of his own person is cut off from reality. Overestimated self-esteem leads the individual to a distorted idea of ​​himself, therefore such a person often feels loneliness and dissatisfaction with himself.

Raising themselves above others, these people behave arrogantly, arrogant and even aggressive, because they have a strong desire to appear better to everyone than they really are. Every now and then they praise themselves, emphasizing their own merits. A stranger is often spoken of with disapproval, sometimes allowing oneself to make too disrespectful remarks in relation to others. Subject has to play an arrogant role out of fear of being himself. He constantly has a fear of accidentally making mistakes.

Psychologists distinguish 3 levels of too high self-perception:

• assessed individual, having a level above the average, has moderate self-esteem, usually flaunts real achievements, but is not always ready to admit his weaknesses and mistakes;
• a person with high self-esteem sometimes he is proud of far-fetched successes, far from reality;
• people with overestimated self-esteem deny any negativity in their own address, idealize their image, in which reality and idealization rarely intersect.

A very high assessment of one's own potential sometimes has a positive effect on a person. The strengths of such a person include self-confidence and decisiveness. A positive attitude towards one's own person does not allow an individual to turn off the intended path due to critical remarks from strangers. A confident partner usually inspires trust. This quality helps in career advancement. Often, a person who feels very confident attracts the opposite sex.

Psychologists note the weaknesses of such a personality:

• egocentrism;
• negative attitude towards self-improvement and personal development;
• overestimation of one's strength;
• disruption of work projects due to an unbearable burden on their shoulders;
• arrogant attitude towards others;
• contemptuous attitude towards the statements of other people;
• painful and aggressive perception of criticism;
• falling into depression, getting neuroses and personality disorders.

With adequate self-esteem, personality adaptively perceives any ongoing events, situations and his environment... People with an increased level of self-assessment cannot give the correct description of themselves and their actions. They often take on new business without first considering all the risks. Such risky activities often lead to miscalculation and failure. For any mistakes, the individual dumps the blame on his environment and the prevailing circumstances. Failure knocks him out of the rut, so it is important for him to never make any mistakes and mistakes that lead a self-confident person to depression and irritability.

Such people prefer put their own interests, desires and hobbies first, often consider others unworthy of themselves... The interests of the partner do not matter to them. An inadequate reaction to the existence of an opposite point of view is manifested in the complete denial of someone else's opinion and the right of an outsider to his own opinion. If the statements differ from the point of view of the arrogant subject, he assures everyone that the interlocutor's judgments are incorrect, even if there is a clear justification and an extensive evidence base. In conversations, he shows inattention to his opponent and constantly interrupts him, as he prefers to speak himself rather than listen to other storytellers.

In the event of a conflict situation, such the person does not give the opposing side a chance to insert even one phrase. It is important for him that the last word always remains with him. He does not know how to ask for forgiveness and apology. Expresses his point of view even when no one asks him about it. He loves to teach everyone.

Too high an assessment of oneself leads to constant rivalry and competition with best friends, casual acquaintances, relatives and colleagues. The individual wants to be always better and more successful than everyone else. He believes in his chosenness and extols his abilities and merits, does not accept advice and recommendations. He prefers to talk with others about himself, his achievements and merits. Tries to establish itself due to this. Increased self-esteem is usually monotonous. There are some of the most common symptoms of people with high self-esteem.

• Arrogance. An arrogant tone is inherent in a person with an overly exaggerated perception of his own person. All requests and wishes of such a person resemble orders.
• Closedness. It is scary for a self-confident individual to show others his weakness and defenselessness. He is often faced with loneliness and misunderstanding. Disapproval of arrogant acts by outsiders often leads to the loss of the necessary interpersonal contacts, the withdrawal of the subject into himself.
• Inability to ask for help... The situation is complicated by the fact that a self-confident person is afraid to ask someone for help, even if he really needs it. He considers such a request a sign of weakness.
• Fear of criticism. He perceives any criticism as a manifestation of disrespect for him, while assuming artificial indifference, demonstrating to those around him his complete indifference to their opinion.
• Lofty goals. The desire to become a famous person often forces you to go ahead to achieve your goal. The individual ceases to notice friends, relatives, colleagues.

Often, an overestimation of one's own strengths begins to form in early childhood due to improper upbringing. This is especially true for families in which one child is being raised or for a long time it was not possible to give birth to a baby. All the interests of the parents are subordinate to the interests of the baby. Mother and father indulge the whims of the child, reward for small successes, do not pay attention to misconduct.

In the family, the baby is made the number one person. The little man's level of self-esteem increases. He begins to feel himself the center of the universe. In case of failures, the child looks for the cause on the side, but not in himself. A distorted perception of one's own “I” is gradually formed. Subsequently, the individual grows up to be an egoist. The idea of ​​oneself as the most important person passes with him into adulthood.

Natural talent often contributes to the formation of too high an opinion about yourself. Some parents try to assert themselves at the expense of the child's merits. For this reason, the baby cannot receive adequate satisfaction of his emotional needs.

It is not uncommon for a person to acquire an excellent student's syndrome., studying in secondary and higher educational institutions, or cultivates this character trait in himself when he reaches certain heights in his career. He no longer wants and cannot lower the existing bar and seeks to prove to everyone his own superiority.

Often behind conceit hides insecurity, an inferiority complex, fears, psychological trauma. In this case, overestimated self-esteem serves a kind of screen from the outside world, a kind of protection from it. This is a kind of way to get positive emotions that were not received in childhood.

High self-esteem in a woman can occur due to her attractive appearance and slender figure. Sometimes the formation of this quality occurs due to the desire to demonstrate their independence so that the representative of the opposite sex cannot restrain her, having understood the superiority of the lady.

A man's high rating is hidden in the imagination of his own person as the main object of the globe. Such a man is prone to narcissism. He spends a lot of time in front of the mirror, does not tolerate rivalry, demonstrates his indifference to the interests of others, ignores their opinion. There are many more men with high self-esteem than women.

Increased self-esteem requires mandatory adjustment, since it negatively affects the state of health due to the development of depression in case of failure. The difficulty in diagnosing the disease lies in the fact that the person himself, who overestimates his potential, does not notice it.He does not listen to the opinions of others, so he is unlikely to voluntarily go to an appointment with a psychotherapist or other specialist who will help get rid of this defect.

Correction depends on the specific case. The arrogant personality needs to accept their negative character traits. You need to be self-critical of your actions. To form a healthy self-esteem, you can analyze your own behavior in case of failures without blaming others. Learn to take responsibility. Don't blame others for your failures.

Listen to critical comments about you... These phrases should not provoke aggression in you. Avoid quarrels. Treat criticism with restraint. Draw conclusions from criticisms.

To overcome inadequate assessment of yourself and strangers it is necessary to recognize the uniqueness of each individual person who has the right to their opinion. Learn to accept someone else's point of view. It is necessary to accept the judgments and evaluations of other people, take into account their desires and feelings, and realize the importance of their existence. During a conversation, train yourself to listen to the interlocutor to the end and show respect for his statement.

Accept your own and others' shortcomings calmly. You should not go into a depressive state due to the inability to achieve the desired result. Analyze the situation, look for the reasons, think about how you can remove the obstacles that have arisen on the way to achieving the goal. Before starting a risky project, evaluate all possible outcomes of this event. If you are not sure of its successful implementation, then it is better to abandon this venture. When planning, set high but achievable goals for yourself.

We must deal with the protrusion of flaunting their merits. Try to mentally compare yourself to a person who has achieved great success in life. Do not get hung up on your achievements, learn to listen to fellow travelers, show sympathy for them. You can lower your self-esteem through self-improvement. You need to treat yourself with a little self-criticism. Learn to distinguish sincere praise from flattery.

Excessive praise does the opposite. The baby develops inadequate self-esteem, which negatively affects socialization and his mental health. Often, parents praise the baby for any little thing. Often, the baby discovers that his successes are not as brilliant as he previously thought. The experiences that arise lead to intrapersonal conflict and psychological trauma.

Successes achieved with the help of child labor, things created by our own hands should be approved and encouraged.... It is very important to praise and support your child, but you should not over-praise. Psychologists do not recommend admiring his external beauty, clothes and toys. The desire to please others is also not subject to approval. Discipline should be taught to the child. It is necessary to stop tightly controlling the little man, and it is better to show more parental love and give him a sense of security. Teach him to respect the opinions of his friends. Do not single out the baby from other children, always point out his mistakes, for which he himself should be responsible.

It is necessary to convey to the child that in case of failure, do not despair... Any mistake should serve as a lesson for the future, an incentive to improve oneself. Let your child set realistic goals for himself and achieve them in stages.