Fear of a fight: causes and methods of struggle

Fear of a fight is a much wider phenomenon than it might seem at first glance. Women, men, children, teenagers and pensioners can be afraid of a scuffle. This fear is beyond age, culture, social status and level of wealth. It is natural, natural and not always pathological. However, the question often arises of how to get rid of it. This article will tell you about this.

A fight for a person is a stressful situation in any case. It is not a natural need, such as eating, sleeping. In addition, a fight is a direct threat to health, and sometimes to a person's life, so it is quite normal to be afraid of it. The nature of fear lies in its protective function. So the brain, or rather its central region, deep and ancient, called the limbic system, is trying to protect a person from what may pose a danger to his survival.

But fears are justified when there is a real threat, and they are irrational when a person is afraid of something that in reality at the moment does not threaten him in any way. And then natural fear turns into an obsessive, painful phobia, which a person cannot control. Fear of fighting is no exception. It can be natural, arising directly in a situation where a person will have to fight, but it can be constant and obsessive, arising at the mere thought that participation in a fight may be required. Phobic fear is considered a mental disorder. In fact, fear of brawl is a hypertrophied manifestation of the instinct for self-preservation. There are no people in the world who are not afraid of a fight.

To understand the mechanism of development of fear of a fight, you need to know some of the features of the functioning of the limbic system of the brain. They are quite interesting. In humans, like most mammals, in response to fear, two types of reactions arise - either you need to run, or you need to fight. First of all, there is a desire to run away as fast as possible, to hide, to look for a safe space. And only if a person does not see an opportunity to escape, he goes to fight. This is a normal, healthy reaction of the psyche of a healthy person. In other words, avoiding participation in hand-to-hand combat is a genetically determined, correct reaction and it is not necessary to get rid of it. To deprive a person of fear means to deprive him of his chances of survival in case of danger.

Fear of fighting is closely related to a natural reluctance to get hurt and hurt. And it is also common for a mentally normal person not to wish the death of an opponent, so the fear of hitting is partly related to anxiety about the prospects of hurting another, killing him. This is not even a question of upbringing, but a normal manifestation of empathy. If a person is a psychopath, a sociopath and suffers from a manic desire to inflict pain, then empathy is completely unusual for him. But the overwhelming majority of normal people do not understand this.

Another reason for fear of fighting is social justification. People, as creatures living in society, tend to pay attention to what others think about their actions. Being branded as an unrestrained, hot-tempered fighter is not the best idea for building a decent reputation.

There is another type of fear of conflict, collision - this is the fear of being disgraced, defeated, defeated. Self-doubt, fear of getting hit in the face and being disoriented, disgraced on the street, in front of other people - this is sometimes exactly what prevents a person from fighting if it was not possible to avoid a fight. And this is the only kind of fear in a situation with fights, from which you can and should get rid of. Almost everyone is susceptible to this type of fear to one degree or another, but it does not become tragic for everyone. - we do not often get into fights to complain of excruciating fear. However, there is a category of people for whom the fear of being defeated in a fight is a chance to lose their wealth, their usual life, goals, achievements, and reputation. These are professional athletes, wrestlers, boxers, MMA fighters.

Of course, it is difficult to call a fight a fight, which is held according to sports rules, a person prepares for it in advance. But whatever you call a fight in the ring, for the human brain it remains the same fight. And the fear of defeat in such a fight can do an athlete a disservice - excitement will not allow him to give all his best, will not allow him to reveal his skills, and the risk of losing the fight really increases. Coping with this fear is usually included in the training program for professional athletes. Coaches pay attention to the psychological reactions of their wards from the first trainings; sports psychologists work with them, if necessary.

The symptoms of a fear of brawl (or sporting combat) are classic symptoms of this emotion. They are based on two components: emotional and vegetative. Confusion occurs in the soul of a person. If it is known in advance that one will have to engage in battle, there is excitement, anxiety, in which all the above aspects are clearly traced.If we are not talking about sports, then a person is afraid of harming another, and getting injured himself, and public condemnation. His brain goes through options to avoid a scuffle, to dodge it, but does not find that it increases anxiety. As a result, a person experiences problems with appetite and sleep - there is no appetite, but he cannot fall asleep or he has nightmares. Fear of defeat is more inherent in athletes, but it manifests itself in the same anxiety.

If the fear is acute, sudden, for example, a situation arose unexpectedly on the street and develops rapidly, then the symptoms are dictated by the action of adrenaline on the nervous system. In case of danger, the limbic system gives the command to the adrenal cortex, and it begins to actively produce and inject adrenaline into the blood. The pupils dilate, the distribution of blood changes - most of it goes to the muscles, because you have to run or fight, the blood temporarily leaves the skin and internal organs. As a result, the person turns pale, sweats, in the area of ​​the abdominal organs, he notes unpleasant sensations (stomach compression, nausea). The heartbeat under the influence of adrenaline increases, blood pressure surges, the world around ceases to exist, all external stimuli become less important, which is why people describe that they have heard their own heart.

As you already understood, you only need to get rid of the fear of defeat, and not the very fear of fighting. This is exactly what you need to do if you want to defeat the excitement before the inevitable brawl. In search of an answer to the question of how to overcome this fear, a person may be faced with a mass of information that temptingly promises quick results. Numerous coach-trainers are ready for your money to conduct training on the topics "how to become a real man", "how to overcome fears", "how to cope with anxiety before a fight" and so on. Most of such trainings and articles are not of any practical benefit, they will not help in principle to overcome such a natural instinct for self-preservation. Such advice is not backed up either from a medical or scientific point of view, and the coaches themselves sometimes understand little about what they say to people for money.

Please note that at such trainings, consulting techniques are usually used, when the coach literally "sniffs" the listener what he needs to do to control his fear (where to walk, how to stand, how to breathe), and the coach-trainer or self-taught psychologist does not care much , but is the person himself ready to get rid of this fear, in which there is more natural than unnatural. Advice to enroll in a boxing section, carry a weapon or, at worst, a stun gun also does not work. A person gets a weapon, but fear grows, because it is possible that this weapon will have to be used against someone, and this is much more terrible than an ordinary blow to the nose.

A more correct method is considered a psychotherapeutic approach. To do this, independently or with the help of a specialist (psychologist, psychotherapist), you need to analyze your fear and understand where it comes from. Perhaps it is a negative experience (you had to be beaten), perhaps a person is afraid only because he saw the consequences of fights with others, perhaps he is afraid of losing his reputation. In any case, you need to start precisely with the formulation of an individual problem and the elimination of it. Methods of psychotherapy, gestalt therapy help to cope with fears from childhood; in case of fear of being amazed, a course of cognitive-behavioral therapy is carried out, which helps a person formulate the correct attitudes and attitude towards victories and defeats in general.

Only when defeat ceases to be perceived as a tragedy and loss of reputation becomes the most common stage of life, its ordinary event, the excitement associated with a possible fight decreases. Very often, the reason for the fear of a fight lies in inferiority complexes, insecurity, they can be initially associated with any spheres of life - study, work, personal life. Therefore, in order to overcome the fear of a fight, it is worthwhile to engage in raising your own self-esteem at various levels. It should be a rich and versatile life, in which there is a place for hobbies, sports, sex, communication with friends.

There is no need to fight fear by trying to eradicate symptoms in order to control, for example, breathing, heartbeat in a dangerous situation. Yes, there are such techniques, and they are very useful for professional athletes, if desired, they can be mastered as part of the martial arts course. You just need to exclude the reason why the excitement arises. To many who are waiting for ready-made "recipes" and step-by-step advice, at first glance, this will seem strange and not even advice at all. But the truth is that it is almost impossible to find and eliminate the roots of your fear on your own. You cannot do without outside help, so you should contact a psychologist or psychotherapist, in extreme cases, try to formulate your fears to someone close to you whom you trust. The answer to the question of how to remove the fear will lie in how you answer the question of why you are afraid of the upcoming fight.