Family hearth at a wedding - all the subtleties of tradition
Today, there are many options for holding a wedding celebration. Someone, following Western traditions, prefers to conduct offsite registrations. Someone wants to spend this holiday only in a close circle. However, most newlyweds and their families still prefer the traditional option with a festive feast and a large number of guests.
In addition to the scope of the celebration, a traditional wedding is distinguished by a large number of rituals., which are committed by both the young spouses themselves and invited friends and relatives. Showering the bride and groom with petals and coins, throwing a bouquet, stealing the bride - all these actions have retained their popularity for many decades. And one of the most symbolic and beautiful traditions is the lighting of the family hearth.
Features of tradition
Lighting the hearth is indeed a very touching action for all participants and guests. Parents of the newlyweds light a new candle from their candles, transferring a piece of comfort to their children. The light in the hands of the bride and groom symbolizes the formation of a new family, for the fate of which the grown children are now responsible. Most often, the ritual of igniting the hearth is unreasonably attributed to a history rooted in ancient times. From the parents' house, an open fire was brought into the house of the young, and for the first time the stove was kindled from it.
In fact, this ritual lives no more than a hundred years, and no ritual of transferring fire before that at weddings existed.
Some associate the lighting of candles by young parents from candles with the wedding ceremony in the church. Indeed, during a religious ceremony, young people hold long thin candles in their hands while the wedding prayers are being read. However, even in this case, lighting a candle at the celebration has no connection with a Christian wedding. At the same time, despite the absence of a rich history, such a ritual is of considerable importance in the holiday schedule, and special attention is always paid to it. The closest thing to lighting up the hearth of a new family is to a parental blessing that loving children receive before tying the knot. So the marriage union receives tacit confirmation and acceptance by all families of relatives and friends.
Choosing and decorating candles
Modern weddings rarely take place in the home of the bride or groom. Most often, a restaurant, cafe or even a whole country club is rented for a holiday. And the family hearth in modern city apartments is more a symbol than a real stove or fireplace, which gives warmth and allows you to cook food for the household. A lighted candle acts as such a symbol, which can be purchased at a wedding salon or made by yourself.
A fragile light, lit in the twilight, gives a moment of trepidation and mystery, as befits such a ritual. At least 3 candles must participate in it: one for the young and one for the parents of the bride and groom. Additionally, you can distribute small candles to the guests, many flickering lights illuminating the couple will be an excellent background for memorable photos. Although there are no hard and fast rules when buying attributes, there are some guidelines that are best considered when buying.
The hearth of the young should be larger than that of the parents, or have a more magnificent decoration.
Most often, this is an ordinary round candle of large diameter, about 15-20 cm high. In this case, the shape of the hearth can be absolutely any and be limited only by the imagination of the wedding decorator or the young people themselves.
Some people prefer other, equally beautiful rituals to lighting a candle. You can replace an ordinary hearth, for example, with a beautiful transparent vase, into which parents and newlyweds pour colored sand. Such a vase will look great in the interior of a bedroom or living room and remind spouses of the holiday. Some plant a tree or flower to symbolize the birth of a new social unit. Another beautiful rite of parental blessing that replaces the traditional ritual is tying the groom's hand to the bride's hand, which is performed by the parents. In this case, the lovers' wrists are tied with many colored ribbons.
After the ceremony, the bride and groom and parents will return to their places, so the best way to extinguish the candles is to extinguish them. If there is a desire to leave the candles burning during the continuation of the holiday, you need to take care of buying three candlesticks in advance. One will have a candle for the newlyweds, and the other two - candles of their parents.
Such accessories should also be combined in style and design both with each other and with the rest of the wedding decor.
It will be most convenient to light the hearth with long thin sticks, so it is better not to choose curly or too small candles for parents. Do not lift the decor, it is better to limit yourself to the lower part of the accessory, since tapers burn faster, and synthetic ribbons and plastic are highly flammable. Openwork carved candles look beautiful, but they are very difficult to make without appropriate experience. It is best to purchase such blanks already cut and decorate them yourself.
If the choice of candles in the store is not happy, you can make all the necessary accessories yourself. The candles are decorated with beads and rhinestones, ribbons and lace, bows and small plastic figures.
Monograms in the form of the first letters of the names of young people or in the form of wedding rings are engraved on pliable wax or paraffin.There are many master classes on the network on the original design of such wedding compositions. All three candles should be decorated in the same style, while the main one is the candle of the bride and groom. It needs to be decorated more magnificently, it should be somewhat larger than the parent's candles and more noticeable. The hearth, made by the joint efforts of the bride and groom, will not only bring the young family closer, but will subsequently evoke more tender feelings in them than a ready-made accessory bought in the salon. A beautiful design can be done by following a short step-by-step instructions.
- Draw or print a small heart on a piece of paper, cut it out with scissors.
- Attach the cutout shape to the candle and carefully trace around the edge with a thick needle so that a noticeable line remains on the paraffin or wax.
- Along the line or along it, lay out beautiful large beads or small beads, glue artificial flowers.
- Inside the heart, you can draw the first letters of the name of the bride and groom with a needle, and decorate them with decor.
- Tie the lower part of the candle with a satin ribbon and decorate with a beautiful bow.
- In a similar way, but with less decor, decorate the parent candles.
You shouldn't put off making candles until the last evening before the ceremony, but you shouldn't make them for several months. Wax or paraffin wax is too pliable, easily deformed, and all glued beads can fall off. In addition, bright sunlight or intense heat can further soften and even melt the material. It is best to do the decoration 1-2 weeks before the ceremony and store the accessories in a special box in a cool dark place.
For how to make candles for a family hearth with your own hands, see the following video.
Subtleties of conducting
A person specially hired for this, who is called a toastmaster, is most often responsible for holding a wedding. Each presenter may have their own ideas about the intricacies of the solemn ritual, but the general principle of its conduct remains always the same. Parents of young people are invited to the center of the hall, who are presented with two long twisted candles. The right to light the family hearth is traditionally given to mothers, since in traditional culture it is a woman's role to preserve comfort and warmth at home.
At the same time, the fathers can contribute to the ceremony taking place during the lighting of these candles. Men light the wicks with a match or a lighter and pass the candles into the woman's hands. The mothers of the bride and groom together bring their own to the largest candle and transmit fire from them, setting fire to the wick.
The hearth itself at this time is in the hands of one bride or both spouses. At the end of the ritual, young people can leave the burning hearth on a special tray or candlestick or put it on the table with gifts.
The time of the ritual and its solemnity can be increased by an additional dance of the young or by lighting many smaller candles from the hearth. Anyone can take small candles and surround the young. The newlywed will take turns to approach the guests and share the fire of her hearth, lighting their lights. This action means that the bride opens her home and her heart to the relatives of her newly-married spouse. Such a ceremony will look especially solemn at dusk, so it is better to postpone it until the end of the entire event.
What do they say during the ceremony?
To properly carry out the ceremony of kindling a new hearth, one beautiful candle is not enough. First, it is advisable for the presenter to tell about the tradition of lighting such a hearth. This can be done in poetic form, in the form of a parable, or simply talk about a beautiful and symbolic action. Secondly, before lighting a candle in the hands of the spouses, parents can say parting words and wishes to them. The candles must be held neatly, brought to each other slowly enough so that the fire on them does not go out from the movement of air.A hearth that went out for a wedding is considered a bad omen and, even if the spouses are not superstitious, it can upset them with unnecessary fuss.
Finally, after the hearth has been lit, the newlyweds can take their wedding vows, if they were not already pronounced at the time of the marriage registration. In addition, the bride and groom can say thanks to their parents and other guests. The ritual is best accompanied by a beautiful melody, selected in advance. It is worth choosing soft and calm music so that guests can hear every word of parental blessing and the response words of the bride and groom. Such an action will be a beautiful end to the whole event and an excellent end to the festive day for the young.
What to do with the hearth after the ceremony?
According to tradition, the candle of the new family hearth should be kept by the spouses for all subsequent years of their life together. She symbolizes the understanding and love of the couple. Some people light this symbol for a few minutes every year on the date of their wedding anniversary, others prefer to save the hearth for more memorable dates. For example, such a date can be the birth of a baby or a wedding anniversary. Lighting the hearth of the young from the candles of their parents, who have kept a happy marriage for many years, will become a beautiful tradition. However, you may have to slightly redo the old design so that all candles are decorated in the same style.
The symbolic ritual will look great on photos in a family album. The main thing is to choose and warn the wedding photographer or camera operator correctly. They should be prepared in advance for video and photos in a semi-dark room, lit only by candles. This will allow you to get clear photos that you can not only place in an album, but also make a portrait out of them. The picture can be hung on the wall or presented to the parents of the young.