Is it possible to get married without registering a marriage at the registry office?

A wedding is a very responsible and serious step. The first mentions of a wedding ceremony date back to the 1st century AD. NS. This sacrament became canonically fixed by the 4th century AD.

The wedding unites once and for all a man and a woman, merges their souls and forms a "small church". All subsequent fate of hearts in love is blessed, becomes fertile ground for the birth and raising of children.

The ceremony is performed only once (there are rare exceptions), so this step should be deliberate and voluntary.

Before performing the ceremony itself, it is required to undergo thorough preparation, consisting of the following points:

• attending special premarital classes;
• reading prayers;
• restriction in food;
• confession;
• participation in the Eucharist.

There are several prohibitions for performing the wedding ceremony. In particular, the rite cannot be performed between relatives up to stage IV: cousins, second cousins, stepbrothers and sisters, godfathers, godparents and godchildren. You cannot get married more than 3 times, not baptized, representatives of different faiths and without parental blessing. You cannot take unbaptized witnesses.

The church does not approve of the wedding of spouses if the age difference between them is more than 15 years. Such marriages are considered fragile and can quickly disintegrate.

It is not necessary to get married immediately after the official ceremony. This procedure can be carried out both in adulthood and in old age. For the latter category of persons, the ceremony will be somewhat reduced, since they no longer need to pray for childbirth.

After the conversation, the priest may recommend to young couples to postpone the wedding ceremony if he feels that they are not spiritually ready for this step yet.

You can perform a wedding ceremony only with full confidence in your soul mate. If this ceremony is really important for young people, then you should not rush to hold it. After some time of life together, it will be possible to sensibly assess the strength of the marriage relationship and even then make a decision about the need for a wedding. On the other hand, the church advises not to postpone the wedding for too long after the official ceremony at the registry office.

Young couples, who officially registered their union at the registry office, have taken an important step that shows the seriousness of their intentions. This cannot be said about persons who live in a civil marriage that is not supported by any official documents.

The Church respects state laws and perceives life in an unregistered marriage as a sin. Such couples do not have the right to become godparents, because their life is permeated with lack of spirituality and debauchery, which means that they will not be able to carry out the proper spiritual and moral formation of a godson. And also people living in an unregistered marriage are forbidden to receive communion before they repent of their life guidelines and revise them.

Any excuses of the young that an official marriage is a formality leads the clergyman to think that the young people are very frivolous about the decision to get married. Another argument that the young, according to them, love each other very much, but have not yet saved up money for the wedding, also does not inspire confidence in the couple's decision to hold the ceremony. In this case, the priest will surely ask about the means for which the young are going to raise children, equip their homes, if they cannot even save 350 rubles for an official ceremony in a non-festive atmosphere.

There are exceptions to the rules for performing the wedding ceremony after the official ceremony. But this is a serious matter, since it is considered not only by a specific clergyman, but also by the diocesan bishop on an individual basis. Such permission for a wedding without documents from the registry office can only be given by him.

There are three groups of reasons why exceptions are made in holding a wedding ceremony before the official one.

1. Both events will take place on the same day. If you show the priest a receipt from the registry office with the date and time of registration, he can first allow you to get married, and then receive an official marriage certificate from a government agency.
2. If there are reasons that threaten the health and life of one of the future spouses. Such reasons are considered serious operations, service in "hot spots".
3. Church obedience and many years of regular attendance at services of both newlyweds. In this case, the abbot can be convinced of the couple's sincere attitude and take responsibility for their spiritual union.

Despite the fact that the church honors state laws, it is believed that without a wedding ceremony following the official ceremony, the union cannot be called complete.

At the beginning of the twentieth century, more precisely, before the revolution, there was no separation between the state and the church, therefore the union, sealed within the walls of an Orthodox church, had legal force. During the Soviet era, church ceremonies were taboo. Today, it is possible to get married only after the official certification of the new union at the registry office.

Clergymen observe state laws and attribute their observance to one of the virtues.A wedding without an official document does not indicate the seriousness of the intentions of both spouses, since this ceremony can be perceived by them simply as adherence to family tradition or as a step where one spouse is confident in his decision, and the other still doubts.

Couples who have lived in unregistered marriages for a long time cannot hope to have a wedding bypassing the standard rules. On the contrary, they will have to go through a number of church procedures (repentance, communion) in order for them to be allowed to get married.

The church recognizes only the union formalized in the registry office as official. Joint children, household and living without documentary evidence is regarded as fornication - one of the deadly sins.

The Church does not approve of life in a civil marriage, believing that in this case the spouses are not responsible for each other, have no obligations, do not trust each other and love insincerely, and love is the basis of Christianity. In addition, the reluctance to formalize relations is regarded by the church as a disregard for church postulates and secular laws.

If, nevertheless, there are compelling reasons forcing the spouses to enter into a spiritual marriage before the official one, you need to sincerely talk with the local clergyman and if he considers these arguments sufficient, the wedding ceremony can be carried out.

For a couple to get married, it takes a long way to go. The couple must first come to church for a conversation. This procedure will clarify all organizational issues, as well as find out the answers to questions about family relationships from a religious point of view.

As part of the conversation, a number of mandatory questions are asked about whether the young have an official document from the registry office or are they just going to tie the knot. If a couple only wants to get married, but does not want to put a stamp in the passport, then the clergyman may regard this as irresponsibility in creating a new family. If the young people want to get married on the same day with registration, then the representative of the church will bless them for the sacred Sacrament.

The newlyweds will have to sincerely answer whether they both want to get married and if they do it under duress. If it turns out from the conversation that one of the spouses does not want to get married, but came to church only because of the desire of the other half, the sacrament will be refused.

The abbot can ask the young a number of personal questions:

• do they plan to have children;
• will they raise and educate them according to the word of God;
• how they perceive divorce, treason;
• what was their relationship in a previous marriage (if any) and why the union broke up.

Of course, all these questions are not asked by the priest out of idle curiosity, he must be sure of the deliberate decision of the newlyweds to hold the wedding ceremony. In turn, young people can also prepare questions for the church representative to clarify certain points. Usually this is due to questions about the content of the ceremony, the amount of time it will take to carry it out, what to wear, whether it is possible to photograph and film the ceremony.

After setting the date and time of the wedding, it is necessary to prepare all the attributes:

• official certificate from the registry office;
• rings;
• candles;
• crosses;
• a large white towel;
• icons of the Savior and the Mother of God;
• towel.

Shortly before the wedding ceremony, young people should adhere to fasting, confess and receive communion in order to enter into a spiritual marriage, cleansed of all evil. One day before the sacrament, one must not eat, smoke, drink strong drinks, or engage in sexual relations.

The image of the bride at the wedding ceremony should be modest. A long white dress of a simple cut, a scarf or veil, comfortable shoes, no makeup.

The wedding itself is divided into 2 stages: engagement and ceremony. Previously, these stages were held on different days, but today they have become part of the same ceremony. First, the newlyweds fall into place. The priest brings wedding rings on a special dish. The priest lights prepared candles and stands in front of the young.

The spouses must exchange rings three times. After this ceremony, put on your own. The priest, holding the groom's crown in his hands, overshadows the latter with the banner of the cross, after which the groom must kiss the image of the Savior on his crown. The crown is placed on the head. The same procedure is carried out with the bride, only in the image of the Mother of God on the bride's crown.

The crowns are held by witnesses throughout the ceremony. Although these sacred attributes are light, the hands quickly go numb.

The priest presents the young people with a cup of wine, consecrated with the banner of the cross. The bride and groom eat it three times in turn. The groom takes a sip first. The common bowl is a symbol of one destiny.

The priest takes the spouses by the hands and joins them, three times they walk around the lectern. Having reached the royal doors, the young stop: the groom kisses the image of Jesus Christ, his wife - the Mother of God, then the young change places. Further, each in turn kisses the cross extended by the priest. Young people are given icons of Jesus Christ and the Mother of God, which must be hung over the bed.

The priest pronounces many years for the young. Those present congratulate.

After the end of the ceremony, the spouses receive a church certificate. This document has no legal force.

The union of the married ones is secured by the Lord God himself, therefore the attempts of strangers to destroy the marriage will fail, and the people themselves will be subjected to a series of life failures.

For information on whether it is possible to get married without registering marriage at the registry office, see the next video.